If you’re married – you took an oath “for better or worse in sickness and in health, until death do us part.” But what does that oath really look like?
Many of my clients come face-to-face with that challenge later in life – more specifically when one spouse’s health declines to the point that they can no longer live at home…maybe the other spouse just doesn’t have the capacity or skills to continue to care for the other. Nursing home care is often part of that equation….even if its just one spouse. What do you do when one spouse may need nursing home care and the other spouse can still go on living at home?
This is one of the biggest challenges that a married couple may face later in life – it’s happening more and more and there are a couple of reasons why. I’ll get to that in a minute.
The scenario when a married couple is looking at nursing home care for one but not the other is gut wrenching really….. It involves not only separation of the spouses often times for the first time in 50-60 years. It also represents a huge financial challenge.
How are you going to pay for this long-term care for the spouse in a nursing home. Where will the money come from? Have you planned for this challenge. For most people today the answer is no. Can other family members help with the cost? If you’ve got assets – what can you keep and what gets spent for that institutionalized care? What does that mean for the financial safety and security of the spouse who remains at home – alone.
For a lot of folks this is one of the greatest challenges that they may have faced in their marriage. What happens next? Can we get help? How do we get help? Is there help for one and not the other?
Most older married couples faced with this circumstance did not imagine having to face this type of challenge. It’s an enormous one. The average nursing home stay can be upwards of 5 years. Right now the cost can be over $10,000.00 a month. You do the math. This can obviously wipe out any savings fairly short order.
Does it doom the other spouse to follow the same path?
What would you do? Do you have the resources to pay for this type of care? How long can you pay for it? Can you get help? Do you know where to find that help? The government offers some benefits – but it comes with strings attached, namely you have to be eligible and if you are your family will face recovery for any benefits that are paid out after your gone? Do you know how that recovery works? Maybe you heard some things – do you know if that’s reliable information?
In this episode, we’re diving deep into a topic that touches so many families—it’s often an unknown until you come into a situation where you’re facing the challenge of paying for but often gets ignored until a crisis hits: long-term care, and what happens when one spouse enters a nursing home and the other remains at home. It’s my hope you will walk away from this episode with some good and reliable information, maybe it will inspire a few conversations as to options related to long term care and if you haven’t done it already – take some steps to put a plan in place for your sunset years. Trust me, you will be glad you did.
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